Time of death: 12:56 P.M., Sept. 6, 2018. That’s when Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker killed the Bitmoji once and for all, by tweeting one to stick it to NFL players who kneel during the national anthem. Peaceful protest? Disrespectful and un-American. The only real way to respect our country is by … posting cartoons in which much younger and better-looking caricatures of ourselves are doing the pledge of allegiance against the cartoon flag. Because he has no concerns about beating a dead horse, the image is now also Walker’s Twitter avatar.
Bitmojis were never cool exactly, and they’ve had a whiff of the parental about them for a few years now. But there was a time, pre–Scott Walker, when we thought of them fondly, as kitschy fun. Not on Walker’s watch! And it turns out the governor has been committing flagrant acts of Bitmoji abuse for years now. The Wisconsin–based website Tone called Walker out as a repeat offender last year—and attempted to age up his emoji by adding some fine lines and more accurate hair. As is, the Walkermoji looks much more like Ben Shapiro or a young Bruce Wayne than Walker himself. Not that it matters. Until someone steals Scott Walker’s phone and deletes his Bitmoji account, we’re stuck with two of him, which is already two more than we needed.
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