How To!

How To Make Friends… Like a Man

Dan Kois and Aymann Ismail on the challenge of finding friends later in life.


Episode Notes

After Zach heard our “How to Make Friends as an Adult” episode, which coincidentally featured all women, he and a few other male listeners wrote in questioning how useful it was for men. He wondered if we could address the unique challenges men face when it comes to making new friends. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Slate staff writers Dan Kois, author of How to Be a Family, and Aymann Ismail, former host of the podcast Man Up, to coach Zach through a few easy tips. “You just gotta be shameless about it,” says Dan. Whether it’s balancing parenthood or playing the numbers game, Dan and Aymann share practical ways to put yourself out there, even if it means being a little bit vulnerable.

If you liked this episode, check out How To Put Your Wife’s Career First.

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Podcast production by Derek John, Rosemary Belson, and Katie Shepherd.

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About the Show

What if Dear Abby were an investigative reporter? Each week, Amanda Ripley and Carvell Wallace take on listeners’ toughest problems and, with the help of experts, find the answers to questions you’ve always wanted to ask but couldn’t. Until now.

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Have you found the advice on our podcast helpful? Send us a note at or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might play it on the air.

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