How To!

How To Save Your Marriage

Amid a pregnancy, a lost job and a pandemic, we’re at a breaking point.

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Episode Notes

Lauren and Carlos are afraid their marriage is at a breaking point. With Carlos out of work, an active toddler to care for, and another child on the way, Lauren and Carlos are feeling pressures familiar to many newlyweds—and the pandemic has only made it worse. Can we help this couple find their way back to each other? On this episode of How To!, we bring on John and Julie Gottman, who are not only co-founders of The Gottman Institute and co-authors of Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, but also have been married to each other for more than three decades. They help Lauren and Carlos begin to heal their relationship with tips that can apply to all couples. For starters, you are not your partner’s therapist, Julie says. Looking for patterns in their behavior will only drive you further away from understanding each other.

If you liked this episode, check out “How To Tame a Chaotic Household.”

Could you use some relationship advice? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

Podcast production by Derek John, Rachael Allen, and Rosemary Belson.

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About the Show

What if Dear Abby were an investigative reporter? Each week, Amanda Ripley (bestselling author of High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out) takes on listeners’ toughest problems and, with the help of experts, finds the answers to questions you’ve always wanted to ask but couldn’t. Until now.

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Have you found the advice on our podcast helpful? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might play it on the air.

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