How to Do It

I Discovered an Astonishing “Secret” About My Boyfriend

There’s no way he did this by accident.

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Episode Notes

This week, Stoya and Rich answer a letter from a woman who wonders if she got duped by her boyfriend—including feedback from listeners like you. Then they hear from a letter writer who wonders if it’s weird that they hate the most basic form of intimacy there is.

Mentioned in the episode:
“The reasons humans started kissing,” BBC Future, Aug. 15, 2021
Stoya’s How to Do It column on kissing

Read the How to Do It column on Slate here. If you’re in need of sex advice from Stoya and Rich, write in here or leave a voicemail at ‪(347) 640-4025 and we may use it on the show. Remember, it’s anonymous—and nothing is too embarrassing!

Production by Chau Tu.

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About the Show

For three years, Stoya and Rich Juzwiak have been giving advice to Slate readers on all things sex—mismatched libidos, secret desires, (bad) sexting, surprising fetishes, and assorted other wild things. Now they’re joining forces to answer their most jaw-dropping questions yet, sometimes with the help of special guests. Whatever you want to know about sex—truly, whatever—they’ll tell you how to do it.

Got a question for Stoya and Rich? Send it anonymously here or leave a voicemail at (347) 640-4025 and we may use it on the show.

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Hosts

  • Jessica Stoya is a writer, performer, and pornographer. She is the author of Philosophy, Pussycats, & Porn, published by Not a Cult.

  • Rich Juzwiak is a senior writer for Jezebel. He has written for the New York Times, the Washington Post, Gawker, and previously gave advice in the web series Pot Psychology.