The Slatest

No One Knows What’s in This Black, Ominous Egyptian Sarcophagus, but It’s Probably Nothing

A battered but imposing black coffin-like structure in an excavated rock
Hmm.
Egyptian Ministry of Antiquities

No one knows what’s inside an ominous black granite sarcophagus recently uncovered in the Egyptian city of Alexandria, the country’s Ministry of Antiquities says, but it’s probably nothing.

The nearly nine-foot-long object is an estimated 2,000 years old, Smithsonian explains, and a layer of mortar between its lid and main body indicates that it has not been opened in that time. Experts say that being interred for that long of a period “might or might not” have enraged a deity entombed within, animating it with a horrible fuel of vengeful rage that could destroy life on Earth as we know it.

An Egyptian official named Dr. Ayman Ashmawy says the sarcophagus, discovered during routine excavation related to a construction project, was found some five meters underground. “And we may curse the day it was disturbed from its rest,” he possibly said under his breath afterward.

An alabaster head was found in the same tomb:

A white alabaster head against rock.
Egyptian Ministry of Antiquities

Its pale, eyeless visage might be the last thing you ever see.

Or it might not!