The Slatest

ISIS Announces Vague Plan to Mint Its Own Currency (Somehow)

Looking to extract itself from the “tyrant’s financial system,” ISIS announced on Thursday it’s planning to mint its own currency. The Islamist terrorist group says the move, like all good forex transactions, is “purely dedicated to God.” The proposed currency will be made up of a series of gold, silver, and copper coins.

While saying you’re going to mint a new currency is not the same as actually doing it, the Financial Times ran the numbers and found a couple of potential stumbling blocks. First, “despite seeking to distance itself from the international economy, the new currency’s underpinnings may make Isis’s economy even more heavily dependent on global fluctuations than most, specifically on precious metal and commodity prices,” according to the FT. “The highest-denominated 5 dinar coin is set to contain 21.25 grams of 21 carat gold, worth about $694, while its lowest-denominated 10 flous coin would contain 10 grams of copper and be worth about 7 cents. The proposed silver dirham coins would range in value from 45 cents to $4.50 at current rates.”

There is no word as of yet from ISIS on the deflationary pressure preemptively being placed on the group’s hypothetical currency by current commodity prices in the jilted “tyrant’s financial system.”