Low Concept

Encouraging Words

Overheard on Paula Abdul’s secret date with American Idol contestant Corey Clark.

Straight up now tell us, Paula…

Wednesday night’s edition of ABC’s Primetime Live presented allegations that Paula Abdul, the American Idol judge known for her upbeat and positive assessments, engaged in a clandestine sexual affair with Idol contestant Corey Clark. In this exclusive follow-up report, Slate presents actual snippets of Abdul’s intimate conversations.

When Clark picked her up at her home:

“Some people might say it’s not classy to leave a lady waiting, but others would say you’re just being fashionably late. You’re going to do awesome tonight, Corey. Way to go.”

As they entered the restaurant:

“I thought to myself, Wow, he’s not going to open the door for me. But the way you just walked in and let it shut behind you—it looked totally effortless. That was all you, Corey. You really grew as a result of it. I’m a fan.”

After their first bottle of wine:

“Without a doubt, one of the most moving merlots I’ve ever tasted. You choose wines that tell the story of your life, Corey. You know who you are and America loves you for that.”

On the appetizers:

“That wasn’t the best tuna carpaccio I’ve ever eaten, but your walnut and truffle tortelloni was the number one choice of the night. So what if this isn’t the best restaurant in Hollywood? So what if the maître d’ sat us near the bathroom? You set out to impress tonight, Corey, and you’re doing just that.”

On dessert:

“At this point in the meal, I felt you needed to order something that showed off your personality and told me what you were all about. Tiramisu was the perfect choice. You just blow me away.”

On the evening’s conversation:

“The number one rule for a guy is, Don’t talk about yourself all night, let the girl speak. You broke that rule tonight, Corey, but somehow you pulled it off. I think you have star quality.”

The next morning:

“People will tell you that morning breath is a major turn-off, that you should go brush your teeth or gargle. But you’re confident, you feel good about your oral hygiene and it shows. You know what you’re all about and I like that. Corey, that was beautiful. You rock.”