The Breakfast Table

It’s Snoopy, Stupid


Lest you wonder why there’s a global crisis, turn to page A4 of the Times today. In Hong Kong, they’re stampeding over Snoopy dolls–being sold for 75 cents at 147 local McDonald’s. On Tuesday, “the Hong Kong police had to break up scuffles among tens of thousands of people who lined up … to buy the Hong Kong Snoopy, a sturdy little fisherman clad in a yellow rain slicker and holding his daily catch.” The Times says people are wondering if “the Snoopy craze is merely the latest sign of Asia’s economic distress.” “The Snoopy costs very little,” said one shrink, “but it represents something–a status symbol.” Others argued that “Snoopy offers valuable lessons about other cultures.” Yeah. Like, we Americans aren’t nearly as goofy as you guys.

Meanwhile, Congress is working hard today to assure that there isn’t another government shut down. I don’t really see the logic in this, Dan. The last time there was a government shutdown, Monica delivered the pizza and ended up on her knees for the first time. Wouldn’t it just be easier to have another government shutdown than to go through all this Impeachment stuff? We could prove once and for all that the President is just a big frat boy, and move on to weightier matters, like the Snoopy craze in Hong Kong.

This morning the intrepid Page Six reports “That Monica Lewinsky’s Israeli grandmother Susi Lewinsky is mortified at her behavior, telling the daily paper Jedith Aconoth, “She brought shame on us … I’m glad my husband did not live to see this happen.” (Actually, that sounds more Italian than Israeli. But, tell me, Dan. Does Monica Lewinsky have any normal relatives?) In other Monica news, Fox has now jumped into the fray of negotiations to buy the first interview. The network claims that as long as it’s done through the entertainment division and not the news division, it’s okay to pay for it. My respect for the National Enquirer continues to grow.

Oh, guess what? Last night, New Yorkers learned that there’s a male 911 operator being accused of hitting on frantic desperate women who call 911. So I gotta go.

Love, Lisa