The Breakfast Table

Hot Friday

Hey Beam:

I just returned from the beauty shop. It’s amazing the number of papers you can plow through sitting with Reynolds Wrap on your head for a few hours. (Oh, I saw Scott Harshbarger there. I was having color; he wasn’t.) I think he will be our next Governor. The encounter and our brief greeting made for a small-town feeling which was actually comforting at this time of Big World tumult.

I did notice that your paper announced they will publish Starr’s report without editing out “the offensive content.” Fox News Channel, however, vowed “to resort to euphemisms, where necessary.” My guess? Necessary.

I was struck by the fact that the press is now reading entrails. Mrs. Clinton used the phrase, “my husband” in her introduction of him last night. She’s been leaving that out for a while. Must mean she’s back on the reservation. Like you, I took note of the Helen Chenoweth domino, I mean, confession. This better not be a harbinger of things to come, or The People’s business might have to be conducted in a revival tent. Hallelujah!

And speaking of religion, many men of the cloth–particularly former friend of the First Lady, Robert Schuller–are saying that the dissonance is too great between the President’s words and deeds and he should retire. Clinton’s Arkansas minister (unlike his Washington one) thinks repenting is adequate. Get ready for much talk of sinners…and do you think it’s possible to have a ceremony for being born a third time? Failing that, I know what he’s gonna give up for Lent.

Just so you won’t think the Christians are hogging the stage, a New Jersey rabbi was charged with having his wife murdered in 1994. A rabbi!