Jennifer Lawrence’s wedding registry has leaked, courtesy of Jennifer Lawrence herself. Rather than go through the embarrassing ordeal of having her registry discovered by internet sleuths, the star, who is marrying art dealer and person-who-sounds-like-his name-is-fake Cooke Maroney, partnered with Amazon and put it up for everyone to see. This seems a tad off-brand for an A-lister, but maybe we should take a cue from Amazon, which calls Lawrence an “actress and philanthropist,” emphasis ours, and consider it an act of charity. Not in that it is actually useful—it is not. But it does provide insight into J. Law’s persona and her approximation of what normal people would put on a wedding registry—or at the very least, insight into what someone J. Law employs thinks normal people would put on a wedding registry. Ladies and gentlemen, an Instagram-less celebrity has given us content to interpret. And it is extremely confusing.
“Planning a wedding is so exciting, but it can be overwhelming,” Lawrence is quoted as saying on the page. “For anyone else needing a little inspiration, I thought it would be fun to collaborate with Amazon to share a few of my favorite registry wish-list items. It’s so easy, and you can find everything you need all in one place.” This sounds more like it was written by a royal copywriter for Kate Middleton than someone like Lawrence, who presents herself as the girl you want to have a beer and a burger with. Why is she suddenly hawking wine carafes?
The idea that this list would be handy or helpful in any way is also suspect, as is the notion that J. Law actually uses $15.99 string lights from Amazon. (I would believe, however, that she uses the $15.99 cheese slicer. Everyone has to slice cheese.) Usually when people talk about wedding planning being stressful, they mean the planning of the actual event—caterers, RSVPs, and whatnot—and not the creation of a wedding registry, which is one of the fun parts because you get to just pick a bunch of stuff you want. Most people don’t need much help with their registries, and if they do, a rich and famous Hollywood star’s recommendations, even recs manufactured for relatability, are not going to be worth much.
What is going on here? Posting a wedding registry for public consumption is déclassé in the first place, and posting one on Amazon to profit from it seems downright tacky. Isn’t Lawrence a bigger star than this? Why would she want to participate in this Amazon store business in the first place? Did Amazon maneuver to get Lawrence’s registry just to prove that it could? Was there some sort of movie deal involved, because now this giant company is a movie studio too? It’s likely that Lawrence herself had very little to do with it—there’s no way she personally picked that pizza stone.
I had thought Amazon stores were for people on a slightly lower echelon of fame and prestige than Lawrence, Exhibit A being Jeremy Renner, but upon further investigation of the offerings in the company’s Celebrity Store, a surprising array of celebrities have participated, including notables like Selena Gomez, Post Malone, and Serena Williams. Has it become acceptable to just sell your soul to Amazon now? (And to sell your soul in such a weirdly opaque way, not something straightforward like a commercial?) I fear that the answer might be that, yes, this kind of spon con is increasingly met with a shrug. In a time when many top female celebrities have leveraged their brands into selling jade rollers and yoga pants and Rihanna peddles Fenty on Instagram, our expectations for celebrities are shifting. It’s harder than ever to have a hit movie or a mass-scale successful TV show, so everyone’s pivoting to merch. J. Law could be looking ahead to becoming a Gwyneth- or Kate-style mogul when the acting gigs slow, specializing in homewares. Think J. Law–branded serving trays, rolling pins, knives, maybe even mops. For now, though, this dewy Amazon page is a pretty sad stand-in for an empire.