Relationships

Other Feuds Taylor Swift Should Solve by Sending Baked Goods

Challah for Harry Styles. Cheesecake for Camilla Belle.

Taylor Swift, wearing a baker's hat and apron, surrounded by bread and cake on a red/magenta background.
Swift is a smart cookie.
Photo illustration by Slate. Photos by Rich Fury/Getty Images for iHeartMedia, Getty Images Plus, Nestlé.

The long cold war between Taylor Swift and Katy Perry finally came to an end last year—Perry sent Swift an olive branch in the form of a literal branch from an olive tree—but it must not have gotten enough attention, because the two have cued up another round of “We’re friends again” publicity. This time, it’s a plate of cookies that Swift sent to Perry, who then, naturally, posted them to Instagram on Tuesday. The cookies are chocolate chip and look homemade, and they’re plated under a message—written in decorating icing, it looks like?—that reads, “Peace at last.”

Swift rarely explicitly acknowledges her various feuds and exes, so this move makes her look self-aware and a little more chill than usual. It’s a positive step for her image—an ungenerous interpretation of this gesture might note that Swift and Perry may both need some help in that department around now—and, I hate to admit, so is reinforcing her longtime devotion to baking. It calls back to the prim, girly, cat-loving Taylor, a persona the star seemingly wants to return to, rather than the man-eating, revenge-seeking Taylor of the Reputation era. Maybe amends-making via baking should be Swift’s new thing, because Perry is far from the only person she has had bad blood with. Taylor, here are some ideas.

For …

Kanye West, of the “I made that bitch famous” fiasco: A cake based on a recipe that Swift hired Milk Bar chef Christina Tosi to personally create for the occasion

Kim Kardashian, co-conspirator in the above fiasco: Alison Roman’s #TheCookies

Calvin Harris, an ex: banana bread

Harry Styles, another ex: challah bread (He’s Jewish!)

Bob Lefsetz, the critic who was so harsh that Swift supposedly wrote the song “Mean” about him: one Melissa’s-style cupcake

John Mayer, an ex again: sourdough

Joe Jonas, another ex: a baked potato

Camilla Belle, who dated Jonas after Swift and is said to be the subject of a pretty vicious lyric in a Swift song: a cheesecake

Jake Gyllenhaal, an ex: chocolate babka

Tom Hiddleston, one last ex: focaccia (to go with his Bolognese)

Spotify and Apple Music, which Swift accused of not properly compensating artists, aka taking her money: for each, one package of unopened Nestlé Toll House chocolate chip cookie dough, the kind that you just break apart and bake

Nicki Minaj, whose callout of MTV in 2015 Taylor interpreted as a shot at her: whoopie pies

Demi Lovato, who criticized Swift for her silence surrounding the court battle between Kesha and Dr. Luke: gingerbread men, but they’re sexy and curvy