Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s first baby, a boy, arrived early this morning, but in the absence of photos or a name for said bundle of joy—Harry told reporters the couple is “still thinking about names” on Monday, and there will be no photos until later in the week—there’s not really much else to say about the little guy. He may be cute, as babies tend to be, but we can’t yet say for sure. He will also eventually have a name, and there will be things to say about that name, but it’s too early to say any of them.
This leaves royal-watchers in quite the holding period. U.K. tabloid the Daily Express boldly stepped in to solve this problem with a, ahem, memorable tweet positing that the Duke and Duchess of Sussex plan to “choose [an] UNUSUAL name for baby that UNIFIES the US and UK.”
Twitter users’ collective royal baby lust, combined with the tweet’s UNUSUAL wording, seemed to instantly UNIFY all of Twitter, transforming the service into an ecstatic, absurd baby-name guessing free-for-all.
This is not the first time a single weird tweet has inspired a widespread Twitter joke, deserved or not. But in this case, the internet’s well-proven ability to turn just about anything into a joke actually serves as a pretty welcome critique of all the royal hot air at the moment. The Daily Express tweet leads to video of a royal commentator named Victoria Arbiter offering some theories about the baby name. “I think when it comes to names, we’re looking at a very strong name, because that’s who Harry and Meghan are,” Arbiter begins. Impressive insight, no? That’s about as deep as her guesswork goes—it’s very clear she has no particular insider information about what the name will be. “I also think we’re going to see a name that works on both sides of the pond,” she continues. Hmm, it’s true that Meghan is American and Harry is British, solid point.
To be clear, no one was seriously guessing that Harry and Meghan’s baby would be named Economic Anxiety or Imperialism. But in a moment when news cycle watchers were desperate to find any royal baby detail to latch onto, the Daily Express’ tweet was a handy distillation of how dumb and baseless this coverage becomes every time another royal reproduces. For one second, it was nice to acknowledge how silly royal baby madness really is.
Please note this post will expire the exact second we learn the name of little Baby Sussex.