Dear Prudence

Dear Prudence Uncensored: The Boyfriend Who Loves Trophy Wives

Every week, Danny Ortberg and Nicole Cliffe discuss a Prudie letter. This week: the boyfriend who loves trophy wives.

Nicole: Oh, boy

Like, I do not want to casually tell people to break up with partners who are generally great

But like HOW OFTEN does he say this shit?

Danny: I mean: he may not necessarily break up with you for a younger woman

Nicole: And what did he say when you told him how it makes you feel?

Danny: but he definitely means it

he does think younger women are cool exciting status symbols

but yeah that part is definitely absent from the letter!

she says she’s told him that makes her feel bad, and we don’t know what his response to that was

Nicole: Well, telling him that does not seem to have been reassuringly final!

Danny: It is one of the downsides of being with someone who’s “a little superficial”

it sounds like for the most part their respective superficialities mesh nicely

and this is one of those “oh, is he going to be superficial to my detriment?” moments that expose, you know, the long-term downsides of superficiality

Nicole: Yeah, I can’t make a slam dunk on this one, but also yes I think he would swap you out like a cracked egg if he got the chance in ten years

Danny: in a heartbeat and without thinking twice

personally I think your best bet is to sabotage his career

Nicole: Hahahahahaha

Danny: so he’s only ever successful enough for a two-years-younger woman and never qualifies for the Sexy Daughter-Aged Model Upgrade (in case it’s not clear, I find this dude’s outlook on success, age, and women to be dumb and gross!)

Nicole: MIDDLE MANAGEMENT FOR YOU

Danny: yeah I mean, it’s your call what kind of bed you want to make/lie in

but I’d certainly say if you’ve told him how it makes you feel and he can’t even stop himself from commenting on how cool much-younger girlfriends are for successful wealthy men, I think you have sufficient cause to think of him either as a starter husband or someone you should break up with

anyhow i hope you are having a wonderful day with your successful older husband

Nicole: Thank you!!! It’s pretty great. He waited until he was successful enough to nab a 25-year-old to get married, the upgrade swap is for chumps.

Danny: I love you.