Bridgerton star Regé-Jean Page hosted Saturday Night Live this week, and if you’re one of the millions of Americans who have fallen for Netflix’s steamy period romance and the sexy, mysterious duke he plays on the show, you know that means one thing and one thing only: Saxophones, and plenty of them! To evoke the spirit of Regency England, SNL’s music department had to find the perfect “Careless Whisper” soundalike, something that clearly evoked the smooth saxophone sound of Wham! without violating any copyrights. As you can tell from the female cast member’s reactions during Page’s opening monologue, they delivered:
Wow! The way the opening notes of the saxophone solo make you think you’re hearing “Careless Whisper,” before they diverge in an uncanny fashion—it’s no wonder Bridgerton is such a hit! In order to scientifically measure how much of the opening monologue’s sex appeal is due to Regé Jean-Page and how much is due to a song that is almost “Careless Whisper” but not quite “Careless Whisper,” here is a different “Careless Whisper” soundalike, “Careless Slow Jam,” by the Jive Ass Sleepers. This video does not feature Regé Jean-Page, so by watching it, measuring its sex appeal, subtracting that value from the sex appeal of the Saturday Night Live monologue, and correcting for the presence of “Unchained Melody,” we can calculate the approximate amount of sex appeal generated by Regé Jean-Page on his own, even in the absence of sultry saxophone solos. My hypothesis is that the saxophones are doing most of the work here.
Well, part of being a scientist is accepting the bitter truth that not all of your hypotheses are going to be correct. “Careless Slow Jam” was way less sexy than Regé-Jean Page’s SNL monologue, despite featuring a lot of saxophone. Looks like it’s back to the lab for me, where I’ll be starting my research over from scratch. At this rate, I’m never gonna dance again.