Behold, traveler! Before you stand four embedded videos, four gateways through which you will find eternal pleasure—or eternal damnation! Each proclaims itself to be the trailer for Maniac, the upcoming Netflix show from director Cary Joji Fukanaga, starring Emma Stone and Jonah Hill. Each promises the unwary a first glimpse of the highly-anticipated limited series, an adaptation of the Norwegian television show of the same name, which, it is prophesied, will arrive on the streaming service on Sept. 21. But beware, traveler, for there can be only One True Trailer! Three false Maniac trailers have been sent by the Father of Lies himself to destroy your eternal soul.
Now heed this solemn warning: Should you choose poorly, not only will you never live to watch Maniac, your eyeballs will burst into flames as they are presented with 50 seconds of the “Maniac” montage from Adrian Lyne’s 1983 film Flashdance! As the smooth sounds of Michael Sembello’s vocals liquify your eardrums and your very flesh drips from your face like wax, your last thoughts will presumably be about the ways cinematography has gotten less male-gazey in the last couple of decades, at least compared to the exceptionally thirsty footage of Jennifer Beals (and presumably, Marine Jahan) found in the False Maniac Trailers. Utter damnation awaits the foolhardy, who will be forced to dance like they never have before, all the way to the gates of hell. So study the sacred text well before making your choice, lest ye fall:
Set in a world somewhat like our world, in a time quite similar to our time, Maniac tells the stories of Annie Landsberg (Emma Stone) and Owen Milgrim (Jonah Hill), two strangers drawn to the late stages of a mysterious pharmaceutical trial, each for their own reasons. Annie’s disaffected and aimless, fixated on broken relationships with her mother and her sister; Owen, the fifth son of wealthy New York industrialists, has struggled his whole life with a disputed diagnosis of schizophrenia. Neither of their lives have turned out quite right, and the promise of a new, radical kind of pharmaceutical treatment—a sequence of pills its inventor, Dr. James K. Mantleray (Justin Theroux), claims can repair anything about the mind, be it mental illness or heartbreak—draws them and ten other strangers to the facilities of Neberdine Pharmaceutical and Biotech for a three-day drug trial that will, they’re assured, with no complications or side-effects whatsoever, solve all of their problems, permanently. Things do not go as planned.
The choice is now upon you, traveler. Will you learn more about an upcoming Netflix series, or will you dance the dance of the red shoes, as so many fools have before you?
The Official Teaser Trailer for Maniac:
A Very, Very Impressive, Jewel-Encrusted Trailer for Maniac:
The Trailer of a Carpenter:
Doctors HATE When You Watch This Trailer for Netflix’s Maniac!
You chose … poorly.