There’s more all-caps BREAKING NEWS in a single day of the Trump administration than a reasonable person could be expected to keep up with. Trevor Noah certainly understands the struggle to stay well-informed. He simply does not have time to address all of the country’s major headlines in a single episode of The Daily Show, which is why he introduced a new segment, Ain’t Nobody Got Time for That, in which he rattles off the news stories he might otherwise not cover at all. Its first installment tackles the hearing of Supreme Court nominee and whitest man alive Neil Gorsuch as well as Ivanka Trump’s ethically questionable level of involvement in the White House.
But the highlight of the segment was Noah’s coverage of reports that Glenn Beck’s network, the Blaze, suspended conservative media darling Tomi Lahren after she made pro-choice remarks during an appearance on The View. “I’m someone that’s for limited government. So I can’t sit here and be a hypocrite and say I’m for limited government but I think the government should decide what women do with their bodies,” Lahren said. “I can sit here and say that, as a Republican and I can say, you know what, I’m for limited government, so stay out of my guns, and you can stay out of my body as well.”
Lahren had previously appeared on The Daily Show for a fascinating, if often uncomfortable, debate with the obviously liberal Noah about Donald Trump (she’s for him), Colin Kaepernick (she’s against him), and Black Lives Matter (she has compared them to the KKK). At times, the conversation recalled the days of Jon Stewart sparring with Bill O’Reilly, with whom Stewart disagreed on virtually every topic but still enjoyed a weird, begrudging kind of respect. Noah showed that Lahren truly is his O’Reilly, as he called out the Blaze for being hypocritical after so often accusing the left of being easily offended “snowflakes” who can’t tolerate different opinions. “Tomi comes out and speaks her truth, says that she’s pro-choice, and then suddenly her bosses go, oh, you like choices? How about you choose a new job?”
Apparently, snowflakery doesn’t just belong to liberals after all. But while Noah says he was offended by the double standard and wants to show support for Lahren, protesting the decision is out of the question. Why? “Unfortunately, there’s no type of black-people protest that Tomi is comfortable with.”