On Thursday morning, several journalists who cover the White House tweeted their gratitude to Tom Hanks, for supplying the White House press corps with a shiny new espresso machine. Burnishing his already strong reputation for menschiness, Hanks added a note:
To the White House Press Corp
Keep up the good fight for Truth, Justice, and the American Way.
Especially for the Truth part.
Dang: Not all heroes wear capes. Literally the only person who cares about our institutions is Tom Hanks! If you think about it, you probably always knew this on some level. The note, probably typed on one of the vintage typewriters that have become Hanks’ chosen post–middle-age eccentric hobby, looked to be signed with a calligraphy pen. This guy!
But wait. Did fearless truth-seeker Jake Tapper, among others, feel the need to bring Hanks down a peg when he tweeted that this wasn’t the first time Hanks had sent over an espresso machine?
Twist! Tom Hanks just keeps buying the White House press corps espresso machines. Does he forget about it after he sends them? Picture Hanks saying to his assistant, “The White House press corps is really doing a bang-up job! What would be a nice gift for them? … I know!” Between returning lost IDs to college students and that eBay alert for vintage typewriter parts, this assistant has his or her work cut out for her.
So this gift wasn’t motivated by the need, now more than ever, for the press to keep Trump honest, nor to one-up Justin Trudeau in their presumed battle over who will be crowned (by your mom) world’s nicest fella. Hanks previously bought the press corps coffee machines in 2004 and 2010. For three presidential administrations now, Tom Hanks and Tom Hanks alone has shouldered the responsibility of keeping the White House press corps’ caffeine levels up. Typical America, honestly: When the state doesn’t cover basic needs, rich people are effusively praised for picking up the slack. Ever consider using your celebrity to lobby for systemic change, Hanks?
Should the press corps want to show its appreciation, Paper Source sells the perfect thank-you card.