Brow Beat

End America’s Mass Shooting Epidemic the Republican Way with Thoughts & Prayers: The Game

Thoughts & Prayers.

GOP Arcade

In the wake of yet another mass shooting, Americans of all political persuasions are looking for ways to prevent the next tragedy before it happens. And while gun control advocates often disagree about the solution, there’s one group that knows exactly what to do: Republican members of Congress. They’re the only people with the moral courage to tell the country the hard truth: The best way to end the mass shooting epidemic—well, second best, after “good guys with guns” everywhere—is to offer thoughts and prayers to the victims. And nothing else. Now, thanks to the folks at GOP Arcade, a new online game gives everyone the chance to be just as effective as a Republican legislator: Thoughts & Prayers: The Game.

Thoughts & Prayers is available to play for free right here. Even in our era of video game hyperrealism, the game shows an extraordinary level of detail: Players watch a map of the United States as news of mass shootings breaks over and over again with mind-numbing frequency. Each tragedy comes complete with a hashtag:


GOP Arcade

You can choose to fight off the onslaught of senseless death and destruction any way you like: by offering thoughts or prayers. (Rumors of a secret third option hidden in the game are, so far, unconfirmed.) Thoughts & Prayers works on phones as well as computers, so it makes a fine way to pass the time while sheltering in place. Can you do as much to prevent mass shootings as real-life heroes Mitch McConnell or Orrin Hatch? The game doesn’t yet offer a leaderboard to compare your skills against other players, but it’s safe to assume we’re all tied for last.