Brow Beat

Watch Stephen Colbert’s Speech to New Graduates

Over the weekend, the University of Virginia uploaded to YouTube Stephen Colbert’s Valedictory Adress to the school’s 2013 graduates. Colbert offers his thoughts on university founder Thomas Jefferson and his version of the school’s honor code (“I have neither given nor received help on this assignment, so help me Adderall”) before arriving at the advice portion of his speech, which includes such gems as: “You do not owe the previous generation anything. Thanks to us, you owe it to the Chinese.”