TV Club

Plot Ideas From G-Men

Dear Terry,

Listen, I’m here for you. Any other bright ideas I have are yours. By the way, I don’t think you should so airily dismiss the feng shui idea. It could open up the door to a whole Chinatown-evil-triad-Kurt Russell-Chow-Yun-Fat subplot. Speaking of bright ideas, a senior official in the national-security complex down here (I’m in Washington) called me not long ago with this one: He thought the Sopranos should weave in a homeland security story line, something about the Coast Guard or Tom Ridge secretly calling on the Jersey mob to secure the port of Newark from al-Qaida penetration. Very dramatic, huh? Paulie Walnuts vs. Ayman Zawahiri. I’d bet on Paulie.

Thanks for joining us today. If this Sopranos thing doesn’t work out, I’m sure we can find room for you in print journalism.