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Samantha, maybe Chris Brown really is a good guy. Maybe this is a one-time mistake, albeit a big one, by a young man still growing into adulthood. Maybe he has learned his lesson by facing public disapproval and losing lucrative endorsement deals. I don't buy it. Men, whether they're 19 years old or 49, don't just accidentally or involuntary raise their hands to strike someone. It is a conscious decision, even if it is a snap decision, to dominate, humiliate, and silence, the person they aren't able to control or convince using ordinary verbal skills. Whether Rhianna forgives him or not is really beside the point.
What's distressing is that so many young women have been voicing sympathetic accolades for Brown and disdain for Rhianna and saying that she probably did something to provoke (read deserve) Brown's anger. Check out any of the many blogs or entertainment news Web sites covering the "Chrianna" imbroglio and you'll see pages and pages of criticism directed at Rhianna from young women who are certain—even without any verifiable proof—that Brown's actions were little more than a momentary lapse in judgment. Anyone who saw the pictures of Rhinanna's bruised and battered face and lips could see that she was the victim of more than a simple errant slap.
Brown has spoken openly about growing up in an abusive home where his stepfather regularly and brutally beat him and his mother. The violent pattern exhibited by men who grew up in violent homes is well documented, so why should we expect Chris Brown to be any different—or any more worthy of our sympathy?
All these young women defending him are being swayed by silly infatuation with a teenage heartthrob. Brown's star power, his winning smile, his cute baby face, his silky voice, and playfully sexy music videos all make for a very appealing combination. However, those qualities do not negate his other less appealing, and possibly dangerous, side. If there is a silver lining in this overcovered story it is that more young people are talking about physical abuse in relationships, and that Chris Brown will be forced to examine his actions and hopefully get some help to break the pattern of violence that he grew up with and learn to speak from the heart instead of with his fists.
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