Tuesday, November 10, 2009 - Posts
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The Twilight Saga: New Moon opens nationwide one week from Friday. The attendant hype machine is already in overdrive. Among its more curious offshoots: a promotional tie-in with automaker Volvo. The marketing effort includes product placement (lead vamp Edward Cullen drives a Volvo XC60 in the film), a contest (to win an XC60 just like Edward's), a Web site (WhatDrivesEdward.com), and a Twilight-themed Volvo television ad.
When I first saw this ad, two questions sprung immediately to mind: 1) Aren't 'tween girls the core audience for the Twilight series? A 'tween can't obtain a driver's license, never mind afford a relatively pricey set of wheels like a Volvo. 2) Aren't vampires basically immortal? Volvo's central brand attribute is safety, which makes it an odd choice for a driver who can't die. Shouldn't Edward be tooling around in something delightfully risky, like a two-seater convertible without a roll bar? Or a vintage Pinto?
According to Volvo national advertising manager Linda Gangeri, the relationship with the Twilight series happened partly by accident. Stephenie Meyer, author of the Twilight books, made Edward a Volvo driver before there was any financial benefit to doing so. When the first Twilight film came out, Volvo execs were shocked to see how much screen time Edward's Volvo received—a full four minutes, which is a lifetime in the world of product placement. The first film's huge success made it imperative for Volvo to get involved with the sequel.
Gangeri claims that while 'tweens can't drive or buy cars, they have significant input into their parents' car-buying decisions. Also, she argues that Twilight in fact appeals to female fans of all ages—including "Twi-moms." Gangeri says that Volvo as a brand skews slightly female, and the partnership with the film is an effective way to get visuals of the XC60 in front of female moviegoers.
As for Edward the vampire, it turns out he drives a Volvo not for himself but to safeguard human friends who ride in the passenger seats. So his character is nurturing and protective, yet also sleek and sexy. Those are exactly the qualities that Volvo hopes consumers will associate with its cars.
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The Shame Index declared last week's episode of How I Met Your Mother the best yet this season. Last night's was surely the worst. A fat suit? Porn jokes? A rough patch, indeed.
Shameful:
—Barney's gift of his porn collection to Ted: This typically Web-savvy series wants us to believe that Barney still watches porn on VHS? The series of easy jokes about porn plots and titles was just plain lazy.
—"Relationship gut": The Shame Index almost always finds the fat suit a comic cop-out, and this was a particularly shameful use of it. The joke never got more sophisticated than "it's funny because he's fat." The only upside was that the fat suit revealed just how good Neil Patrick Harris is at using his physiognomy to sell his material. The few potentially funny lines from this sequence—"I'm my own wingman tonight"—fell flat when they came from Fat Barney's expressionless mask.
—Lily's absurd plan to break up Robin and Barney. A claustrophobic scene—stuck in a station wagon with a bunch of bad running jokes: Marshall's insistence that Ted should have rented a van, Ted's persistent references to the porn collection, etc. Even a cameo from Alan Thicke couldn't save the scene, and that's saying something.
—Robin and Barney's breakup: After all that—a season's worth of will-they-or-won't-they—this is how Robin and Barney's relationship ends? Because they've been fighting about dirty dishes and how best to describe the codpiece of an Imperial Stormtrooper? (Barney's womanizing past—a more believable concern for Robin—is lumped in with these frivolous issues and not seriously explored.) "Maybe there's just too much awesome here," Robin concludes. The Shame Index begs to differ.
—This isn't a breakup—we're getting back together as friends. Was that line left over from a Robin-Ted breakup scene that never aired? Jeepers.
Awesome:
—"That's not how you spell Buckminster Fuller." (OK, there was one funny porn joke.)
—"It was Legend ... wait for it ... s of the Fall."
—The Lost in Space robot gamely asking whether anyone wanted to get high after Lily's breakup plot fails.
—Crazy Meg to Alan Thicke: "So, you still on 73rd Street?"
After last week's episode, the Shame Index was bullish on the Robin-Barney relationship—it seemed that after a few false starts, the writers were beginning to find ways for these two to be funny together. Yet others—the HIMYM experts at New York's Vulture blog especially—have argued that putting Barney in a committed relationship deprives HIMYM's best character of his signature trait. The Shame Index would have liked to see the series try a little harder to make Swarkles work. But maybe awesome really does neutralize awesome.
Previous Shame Indices: Episode 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
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